Supporting your child

Supporting a child with Special Educational Needs and Disabilities (SEND) can be challenging, but knowing about the support available through an Education, Health, and Care Plan (EHCP) can have a tremendous impact on your child’s education and well-being.

An EHCP is a legal document that outlines the educational, health and social care needs your child has, what support will help them thrive and where that support will come from. It also gives you the right to request a place at a specific nursery, school or college. Here’s everything you need to know to start the process and secure the support your child deserves.

What is an EHCP?

An EHCP is designed for children and young people aged 0-25 who need more help than their school can normally provide. It identifies specific needs, desired outcomes, and the type of support necessary to meet those needs. Importantly, an EHCP is legally binding meaning that the local authority must provide the support outlined in the plan.

But remember, even without an EHCP, schools are still responsible for making reasonable adjustments to help your child fully participate in school life.

Who Can Request an EHCP?

The process starts with a request, which can be made by:

• Parents or carers
• Young people themselves (aged 16-25)
• Your child’s school or nursery
• Health or social care professionals who work closely with your child, like doctors or health visitors

How to Request an EHCP

To begin the process, you need to request an EHC Needs Assessment from your local authority (LA). This request can be made:

1. Online: Many LAs have an online form on their website.
2. By letter: Include a description of your child’s needs and why you believe an EHCP would be beneficial.
3. Through your child’s school: Often, schools will support you by initiating the request if they feel it’s appropriate.

What Happens Next? The EHCP Timeline

1. The Initial Decision (6 weeks)

When the local authority receives your request, they must consider whether your child has or may have special educational needs (SEN) and if additional provisions beyond what’s ordinarily available in school may be necessary. This decision process is guided by Section 36(8) of the Children and Families Act 2014:

The local authority must secure an EHC Needs Assessment for the child or young person if, after having regard to any views expressed and evidence submitted, the authority is of the opinion that:

• The child or young person has, or may have, special educational needs; and
• It may be necessary for special educational provisions to be made for the child or young person through an EHC Plan.

Within six weeks, the LA must let you know whether they’ll proceed with an EHC Needs Assessment. If they decide not to assess, they must explain why, and you have the right to appeal this decision.

2.  The Assessment (up to 16 weeks)

If the LA agrees to assess, they will gather information from a range of professionals who know your child, such as teachers, healthcare providers and therapists. By the end of this period, the LA will either:

• Issue a draft EHCP, or
• Notify you that they’ve decided not to issue a plan, with an explanation and notify you of your right to appeal the decision.

3.  Draft EHCP

If the local authority sends you a draft EHCP, you have 15 days to review it. This draft gives you a chance to confirm that everything accurately reflects your child’s needs and the provisions recommended by professionals, as well as request a specific school. Be sure to check:

• Whether all of your child’s identified needs and professional recommendations are included.
• That the outcomes (or goals) are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-based.
• That provision details are clear, covering the type, amount, frequency of support, and necessary expertise.

4.  Final EHCP Issued (within 20 weeks)

After making any final changes, the local authority will issue the final EHCP within 20 weeks of your initial request. Review it just as carefully as you did the draft to ensure it reflects your feedback and that the right school is listed in the plan.

5.  Appealing a Decision

If the Local Authority decides not to assess, not to issue or you’re unhappy with the contents of the final EHCP, you can appeal these decisions and the next steps are:

Contact a Mediation Advisor

• Call the mediation advisor within 2 months of the decision/letter (details will be on the LA decision letter)
• Tell the mediation advisor what you want to do. If you don’t want to try mediation, they will issue you a certificate within 3 working days, which will allow you to make an appeal.
• If you do want to mediate, tell the mediation advisor and the LA- they will arrange mediation within 30 days
• Mediation is designed to be a less formal and faster way to resolve issues. The LA is required to send a representative with decision-making authority. Any agreement you reach here is legally binding.
• If the matter isn’t resolved through mediation, you can proceed with an appeal to the SEND Tribunal, where you’ll have the chance to present your case.
• File an Appeal (Refusal to Assess: Form SEND35A, All other EHCP appeals: Form SEND35) with the SEND Tribunal, providing relevant evidence that demonstrates why your child needs an EHCP. Useful documentation may include reports from Educational Psychologists, Speech and Language Therapists, or other specialists who are familiar with your child’s needs.

The journey toward securing an EHCP can feel complex, but the plan’s long-term benefits make it worth every step. Your advocacy and involvement can make a world of difference in setting your child up for success.

How I can help

If you’re unsure about any stage, there are resources that can help. Charities like IPSEA and SOS!SEN offer guidance, and as an advocate at SEND Teach, I’m available for a free 30-minute consultation to help you navigate the process. I can also support you through all stages, from application to appeal and have created this flowchart that shows all of the steps. For more information, please visit my website or contact me via email.

Head to the parenting section to read more articles about getting the right support for your child.

By Ian Timbrell, Founder, More Than Flags and Rainbows CIC

When children start school, we often talk about how to help them settle. But for adopted children, school needs to be more than a place to settle – it needs to be part of the healing.

I’ve spent most of my career working in education – first as a teacher and deputy head, and now through More Than Flags and Rainbows, a not-for-profit that helps schools become more inclusive and understanding of every child’s story.

I’ve seen time and time again that one of the reasons that school fails for adopted children is when communication between school and families breaks apart, or either side makes assumptions about what the other ‘side’ know.

Why communication matters

One of the most common frustrations I hear from adoptive parents is that schools just don’t get it. They don’t understand attachment, or why certain things are triggering, or why a reward chart can cause a meltdown. And it’s true – sometimes they really don’t. But teachers can’t know everything.

They’re rarely trained in adoption or trauma, and they don’t always see the invisible threads connecting behaviour to past experience. Even as a teacher and adopted parent myself, there have been times when I’ve made assumptions about my son’s school, which has led to misunderstandings.

It can feel unfair that parents have to educate schools, but sharing what we know can prevent so many painful misunderstandings later. Too often, schools only learn what a child needs after something has gone wrong – after the tears, the outburst, or the exclusion. What we really need to do is get ahead of it.

Starting the conversation

Before your child even sets foot in the classroom, ask to meet the teacher or headteacher. You don’t have to tell your child’s whole story – just enough for staff to understand what helps. That first conversation isn’t about unpacking everything that’s ever happened; it’s about trust and clarity.

You might explain that your child needs to know what’s happening next, and that countdowns or visual timetables help. You could mention that quiet withdrawal often means anxiety, or that noisy playtimes can be overwhelming. It might be useful to note that unexpected touch – even a friendly pat on the back – can trigger panic, and that calm consistency is key when your child feels unsure.

It can also help to talk about your parenting approach, so teachers understand what kind of response works best. You might explain that you use calm voices and connection before correction, or that public praise can make your child uncomfortable. Some children don’t respond to reward charts or sanctions; they need space and reassurance instead. This context gives teachers confidence to respond in ways that mirror the safety you’ve built at home.

Sharing their story carefully

It’s also worth considering what aspects of your child’s background to share. The key question is always, does this information help the school meet my child’s needs? Staff might need to know that your child has experienced loss or trauma, but not the details of how. They might benefit from understanding that certain topics or smells are triggering, or that early experiences can affect memory and concentration.

Sometimes it helps to show the teacher part of your child’s life story book – perhaps a few pages that explain your family structure or the concept of adoption. It can make things more tangible and reduce awkward assumptions. But remember: this is your child’s story, not yours to tell freely. Only share what your child would be comfortable with others knowing. If you do share something, be clear who can see it and how it should be handled.

Keeping communication going

Once school begins, keep communication open but light. A short email, quick check-in, or positive message home can make all the difference. Teachers often hear from parents only when things are difficult, so small positive updates help build trust.

If your child is unsettled, you don’t need to go into great detail – a brief note like, “We’ve had some contact with birth family, so emotions might be high this week,” gives staff helpful context. And when things go well – a brave moment, a smooth morning – tell them that too. It reminds teachers that progress is happening, even when it’s slow.

Getting ahead of tricky moments

Many problems in schools come from a lack of awareness, not a lack of care. A teacher might plan a “family tree” project or Father’s Day card activity without realising how it could affect your child. As parents, we often spot these things first, so it’s fine to speak up early. Most teachers are grateful when you do.

By raising things before they become problems, you’re not being difficult – you’re helping everyone succeed. You’re also paving the way for other families who may face similar challenges in the future.x

When things go wrong

Even with the best preparation, there will be difficult days. A misunderstanding, a harsh comment, a call home that hurts. Schools are full of good people doing their best in busy environments, and mistakes happen. Try to remember that you and the teacher ultimately want the same thing: for your child to feel safe and succeed.

If you feel the school could understand more, share a resource or suggest training. That’s one reason I founded More Than Flags and Rainbows – to give schools the tools they often wish they’d had sooner. When teachers learn about trauma, attachment, and identity, they stop seeing “bad behaviour” and start seeing the child behind it.

The partnership that heals

When home and school work together, children notice. They feel the consistency, the calm, the shared understanding. That’s where the healing begins – not in dramatic interventions, but in small, steady moments of care. A teacher who greets them warmly each morning. A parent who feels heard. Tiny actions that, over time, build belonging.

At More Than Flags and Rainbows, we offer free resources for parents and schools, including anti-bullying leaflets, guides for talking to schools about inclusion, and a network for adoptive parents in South Wales. You can find these resources and more on our website, as well as information about how to support our work.

Together, we can make sure schools aren’t just places of learning, but places of healing – for every child who walks through the door.

Head to the homepage to read all the latest articles about adoption, parenting and wellbeing.

Unfortunately, many adopters find the process of getting the assessment and the right plan in place is extremely stressful and drawn out, causing further delay to many children accessing the right type of education in the best setting for them. In this article, adopter Christina shares her family’s experience.

The realities of applying for an EHCP

Our daughter was nearly four-and-a-half years old when she came to live with us. Due to her complex needs, she went into nursery quite early on during foster care to allow the foster carer some respite. She required 1-1 care at all times as she was unable to walk, talk and was tube fed, amongst many other behaviours that required support. Emergency funding was sought, and the local authority, as her corporate parent, applied for her EHCP. 

Although we had a lot of experience with complex needs, we had not really dealt with the education side, so the EHCP process was very new to us. We didn’t know anything about the EHCP being in progress until we were invited to look through the draft document.

The process was very quick compared to a standard EHCP application, and an educational psychologist came to our home within days of our daughter moving in. I assume this is because at that stage, she was a looked-after child, vs a standard application. It was decided that she would go to a mainstream school, ideally one with a specialist unit and a full-time 1-1. These took some time to get in place, but she started school a month later than her peers, for an hour a day.

Lack of information

We had no information on what should have been in the EHCP, and it was signed off by the LA as her ‘parents’. We didn’t see any of the reports provided, including the educational psychologist’s report. Just last year (six years on), we did finally manage to get our hands on this report, and we learnt that if some of the recommendations in it had been included in the EHCP around her trauma in an education setting, then her time at school could have looked very different. Sadly, this is just another example of our daughter being let down by the local authority, which should have been there to support her.

Finding the right educational setting

Our daughter remained in mainstream school for the next few years, barely moving past a part-time schedule, isolated in rooms alone with her 1-1, unable to access any of the curriculum, and medical needs, as well as many other needs not being met. Eventually, in Year 3, the school finally agreed they could not meet her needs. Fortunately, the local authority very quickly agreed that she needed specialist provision in the form of a special school. We thought that the difficult part was done, but sadly, this was to come.

For the next 18 months, we had to overcome every barrier possible in trying to find a suitable special school. We begged and pleaded with schools to give her a chance, but time and time again, we were hit with her needs are too broad and complex, we can’t keep her safe, we just don’t have the staff to support that level of 1-1 in this environment.

We eventually hit a jackpot. An independent special school that specialises in trauma and attachment. It wasn’t a perfect fit, and there would be some obstacles to overcome in terms of physical needs, but they were willing to try, and that was important to us.

Further delays

The local authority did not want to pay the price of this special school, so it continued to consult with schools in other counties for a long time, getting similar responses. Eventually, the local authority gave in and asked the independent school to take her on. But 18 months had passed, and this school now had a new headteacher, many changes had been made, and they did not believe they could meet her needs any longer.

During this time, I had to make 5 different complaints to the local authority for poor communication, failure to provide an adequate education. These complaints were upheld by the local government ombudsman and compensation offered, but this didn’t get my daughter an education. It didn’t find her a school.

Education other than at school

After this extremely long and stressful 18 months, the school-based trauma was higher than ever, and I told the local authority no more. I demanded a package of EOTAS (education other than at school), and it was agreed. She left school a few days later.

EOTAS is not what we wanted for our daughter, and it certainly didn’t seem like it would be best for our family, considering the difficult and complex behaviours we had to manage on a daily basis. She started at an alternative provision for 3 hours a week, and the local authority refused to offer any more than this.

So, for 5 months she received 3 hours a week ofeducation, with a journey of 1.5 hours each way to get there. I had to attend the provision for 9 months with her because cross-county difficulties meant that nursing teams would not train the staff, and the local authority refused to pay an independent company. Eventually, after 5 months and a lot of fighting, we got a personal budget for a basic education package put in place.

Fighting for her education

Things changed dramatically at home very quickly. Difficult behaviours began to improve. Don’t get me wrong, they were still very much present, but so much more manageable! She began engaging better in her post-adoption therapies, and just generally became so much happier. I started to think that maybe this would work after all! 

It has been 2.5 years since we embarked on our EOTAS journey, and it has been anything but plain sailing! The local authority has no intention of these children receiving a full-time education, they are offered the bare minimum and you are led to believe you should be grateful for what’s offered.

Every single annual review is a fight to keep education in place, leading to endless formal complaints and local government ombudsman investigations. I provide the majority of the education, despite laws saying a parent should not be expected to educate their EOTAS child. She receives 9 hours a week at an alternative provision, and a small personal budget. She does not get a full time education and each week I have to drive 15 plus hours to provisions that last for as little as an hour at a time.

However, we do this because it makes our daughter happy, and we absolutely love this extra time we have with her.

Advice to parents

My advice to parents would be to apply for the EHCP as early as possible and if school will not support it, do a parental application.

Appeal, appeal, appeal. If the plan is not right, appeal this decision and keep taking it further. Push to get funded reports from as many people as possible. If you have evidence of sensory or speech and language needs etc, push for an assessment of these for the EHCP.

Find your people, whether they are local, on Facebook groups, wherever you find them, they will be the most amazing support network for you.

Keep battling until you get exactly what your child needs. You know your child better than anyone. It soul destroying the amount we have to fight for our children, but we have to battle through and keep fighting. Your child’s future depends on you getting them the right level of support and provision in place. I would advise parents and carers not to wait, and to apply for the EHCP as early as possible.

Head to the homepage to read the latest articles about adoption, parenting and more.

So, that’s what it is, which is the easy part. Finding out how it’s being used in your child’s education establishment, and getting it to be used to help them, is a whole different issue.

Pupil premium starts in nurseries and pre-schools. It aims to help early years providers improve the education they give to disadvantaged children which includes those who are adopted. I have to say, I didn’t realise until our girls left nursery that this was the case. So, I don’t know what provisions either of the two nurseries our girls attended had in place to use the funding.

Pupil Premium Plus

Pupil Premium Plus applies to the following types of schools:

• mainstream infant, primary, middle, junior, secondary and all-through schools serving children aged 5 to 16
• schools for children with special educational needs or disabilities
• pupil referral units (PRUs), for children who do not go to a mainstream school

The funding currently entitles schools to an additional £2630 (2025/2026) per eligible child. How the funding is allocated is up to each individual school. It has to be spent so that the eligible child benefits, but that doesn’t mean non-eligible children don’t benefit as well.

For example, a school may decide to spend some of the funding on giving teachers additional training on a particular area such as trauma awareness, that will benefit an eligible child. But having those skills will benefit all pupils who are taught by those teachers, not just the eligible child. If your child requires additional support that the school can’t provide, the fund can be used, for example, for one-to-one tuition.

Every school has a requirement to show how they’re using the funding. And as a parent of an adopted child, the school should be informing you of how the funding is being used to benefit your child. With our eldest, we get a letter each September to explain what the funding is being used for.

Our school allocates it to milk, school trips, and after-school clubs for infants and school trips and after-school clubs for juniors. So far, we haven’t had to ask for it to be used for anything else. But I suspect that will change this academic year in respect of our eldest daughter.

Virtual School

If you have any issues with the way your child’s school allocates the funding, the Virtual School can step in to help.

Pupil Premium is something that a lot of adoptive parents don’t know about or fully understand. I’m one of those parents. If you’d like to know more about it and how it can be allocated, Emma Spillane has created a brilliant free download which you can find out about here. Emma supports vulnerable children and their families in education, through training and support.

Head to the parenting section to read more articles about education.

Reading is a key part of a child’s development. It helps them to become independent and also opens up a world of stories and adventure so they can get lost in a book and learn to use their imaginations. Helping your child to read is something parents do all year round, but having a day such as World Book Day helps to highlight the importance of reading as well as different ways to teach them.

All parents are keen to find ways of making learning fun and enjoyable for their kids, particularly if they struggle with conventional teaching methods. Because that really is key. If reading feels like it’s boring and part of a set format of learning, kids are likely to lose interest. Making learning fun is what Phonics with Robot Reg classes aim to do to teach children early phonics skills.

Phonics with Robot Reg classes

The classes provide fun, high-energy classes which open a world of literacy to children from ages three months to six years. All classes are fun, varied, and educational so children don’t even realise they’re learning. And because they’re designed by a primary school teacher and are linked to the Early Years Foundation Stage Framework (EYFS), parents can be sure their child is covering everything they need for their stage of learning. Classes are available across England in various locations. Check out the interactive map on their website to see if there’s one near you.

Make it fun

Theresa Batey, of Phonics with Robot Reg Central Bedfordshire, shares some tips about making reading fun for your child:

“Make reading and sharing books an enjoyable and pleasurable experience – it shouldn’t feel pressured or forced.

Part of your routine

“Build sharing stories and books into your daily routine, bedtime is always a great time to read.

Be comfortable

“Get comfy – you don’t have to read sitting on chairs upright at a table. Snuggle up on a sofa or read in bed.

Make it interesting

“Choose reading materials that interest your child – this could be comics, non-fiction texts, or stories by a favourite author.

Repetition and rhyme

“Read stories with lots of repetition and rhyme, encourage your child to join in with repeated refrains, and allow them to suggest the rhyming word.

Reading skills

“Model reading skills to your child e.g following the text with your finger, sounding out, using pictures for clues, and supporting understanding.

Prompts and ideas to talk about as you read

“What do you think this book is about? What do you think will happen next? I wonder why…? What was your favourite part of the story? Share your thoughts and feelings about the story – which bit did you like and why?

“When your child is reading to you (developmentally appropriate text) make it a positive experience. Show active listening skills, offer praise as they read to you, and support them to sound out words and reread sentences.

“Keep it short and sweet – they don’t have to read you the whole book, take turns reading a page at a time.”

Supporting a child with learning difficulties

Phonic with Robot Reg classes are suitable for children of all abilities and because they make learning fun, can be great for children who struggle in formal settings. Kat Warne is a Phonics with Robot Reg teacher based in Sevenoaks and adopted her son when he was four years old:

“We adopted my son Ethan from China when he was aged four. He’s now 14. We knew he had a heart condition but when we met him he was only babbling. Since being home we’ve discovered a hearing impairment impacting on his speech acquisition. He also has DLD (developmental language disorder), mild learning difficulties, autism, and dyslexia. He attends an SEN school for speech and language.

“As an adoptive mum, I always say work with the child where they are not where you expect them to be. Use positive praise, if they make a mistake never say “no” say “nearly!” or “so close !” Model the correct word. If they don’t know tell them don’t ask them to guess as that’s setting them up for failure.”

To find out more about Phonics with Robot Reg, have a look at their website or follow them on Instagram and Facebook. The website also has details about Counting Kids which makes maths and counting fun for pre-schoolers aged two to four years old.

Head over to the parenting section to read more articles about education and learning.

From its base in the heart of the Northumberland countryside, the farm offers a wide range of activities to meet the needs of children and young people who:

• are unable to attend mainstream school currently
• would benefit from additional support outside of the classroom setting
• have been or are close to exclusion
• have complex neurological conditions
• are care experienced

During their time on the farm, they go on a journey of discovery, learning about the abilities and skills they already have, but haven’t understood how to use in the constraints of the mainstream education system. In this article, Solidarity Farm’s founder, John Harrison, shares a bit about what led him to create this unique learning environment and some of the services they provide to support children and young people and help them to thrive.

I began Solidarity Farm CIC on our family livestock farm in Northumberland in 2023. My career had begun in farming in 2001, but I left in 2009 following my own struggle with isolation and increasing anxiety when ultimately it dawned on me that the only option was to let go. This led me to three years volunteering in Malawi, completing the Camino de Santiago, a further three years in Liberia working in development, and five years working for a homeless charity in the UK, followed by a period working for a local forest school.

Two things I have learned on this journey and coming full circle back into farming, looking at the world from a different lens are:

1. The stories that you tell yourself are not always true.
2. When you let go those that hold you are not always who you expect, with belonging found in the most unexpected places!

Drawing on these lessons and all of the experiences I learned during my time away from farming, I wanted to create a safe space for those children and young people who don’t fit into the mould in terms of education and learning, helping them learn life skills away from the conventional classroom setting. Solidarity Farm believes in mutual support within a group and provides young people with a space to belong and discover more about themselves through undertaking meaningful, fun and character-building activities. We do this by spending quality time outdoors in a safe and supportive farm-based environment that allows the development of a community through undertaking shared experiences that are enriching but also offer different perspectives.

We provide a wide range of experiences from educational farm visits to holiday activities and alternative education provision. On the farm this year we have offered funded holiday camps through the government-funded HAF programme, educational farm visits and alternative education in both small groups and on a one-to-one basis and I continue to learn from the young people who join us. It’s been a real privilege to see how much young people from a variety of backgrounds love the sense of freedom being on the farm brings, embracing the outdoor play of forest school and how in an alternative environment, those who may have been labelled as having behavioural issues can take the lead, demonstrating a far wider set of skills than can be evidenced in the classroom.

Nature and a farm offer a safe space for connection, free of judgment, where the pace of life slows down and meaningful relationships can thrive. We continue to see an increasing demand for our services and want to accompany those young people who are struggling with mainstream education, allowing social and emotional learning to take place.  In 2025 I hope we can continue to develop relationships with individuals and organisations that share our values, reaching those young people who would benefit the most from joining us on the farm, while allowing them to take the lead in shaping our offer.

It’s still early days for us, but we are fortunate to have started the journey, and I am excited to see where it leads. You can find out about the work we do at Solidarity Farm from our website and our latest newsletter. If you’d like to support the farm and the work we do with children and young people, please get in touch.

Head to the homepage to read the latest articles about adoption, parenting and more.

Whether your child is starting to learn about literary analysis in school, and you want to help them succeed, or you simply want to make sure that you’re raising a young person who is better able to think, understand, and comprehend complex ideas and emotions, getting deeper into reading is always a good idea. But how do you make sure that they’re engaging with books on the level that’s appropriate for their age? If your child is moving into their teens, here are a few key tips to keep in mind.

Photo – CC0 License

Making Reading a Routine

One of the most effective ways to help your children engage more deeply with the books they read is by making reading a regular part of their daily routine. Just as you would set aside time for homework, sports, or other activities, it’s important to carve out dedicated time each day for reading. This routine helps to establish reading as a habit and a valued activity in their lives. Whether it’s before bedtime, after dinner, or during a quiet afternoon, consistent reading time allows children to immerse themselves in books without distractions. Over time, this routine not only improves their reading skills but also fosters a deeper appreciation for literature. Consistency is key, as it helps children to develop a natural rhythm for reading, making it a regular and enjoyable part of their day.

Creating a Good Reading Environment at Home

The environment in which your child reads can significantly impact their ability to engage with a book. Creating a cosy, comfortable reading space at home encourages children to settle in and focus on their books. This space should be free from distractions like televisions or loud noises, allowing them to concentrate fully on their reading. Consider setting up a dedicated reading nook with comfortable seating, good lighting, and a selection of books within easy reach. The goal is to create a space where your child feels relaxed and eager to dive into their reading. A positive reading environment not only makes reading more enjoyable but also enhances comprehension and retention, as your child is more likely to focus on the material and engage with it on a deeper level.

Choosing the Right Books for Them

Selecting the right books for your child is crucial in helping them engage more deeply with reading. Books should be age-appropriate, interesting, and challenging enough to stimulate their thinking without being too difficult. When choosing books, consider your child’s interests, reading level, and the themes or topics that resonate with them. A book that aligns with their interests is more likely to capture their attention and encourage them to read more thoughtfully. It’s also important to introduce them to a variety of genres, from fiction and fantasy to biographies and history, to expand their literary horizons. When children read books that they find both enjoyable and relatable, they are more likely to engage deeply with the text, think critically about the content, and develop a lifelong love of reading.

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Encouraging Them to Choose Their Own Books

While it’s important to guide your child in selecting appropriate books, it’s equally vital to encourage them to choose their own reading material. Allowing children to pick their own books empowers them and fosters a sense of ownership over their reading. This autonomy can significantly boost their motivation to read, as they feel more invested in books they’ve selected themselves. Encourage them to explore different sections of the library or bookstore, and to choose books that spark their curiosity. This practice not only makes reading more enjoyable but also helps children develop their taste in literature. When children are excited about the books they’ve chosen, they are more likely to engage deeply with the content, think critically about the story, and develop a stronger connection to the material.

Asking Specific Questions About Their Books

To help your child engage more deeply with the books they read, it’s important to ask specific questions about the story. Instead of simply asking if they liked the book, dive deeper by asking about the setting, plot, characters, and themes. Questions like “What was the main conflict in the story?” or “How did the setting influence the characters’ actions?” encourage children to think critically about the book and to reflect on what they’ve read. This practice not only improves comprehension but also fosters analytical thinking. Discussing the characters’ motivations, the choices they make, and the outcomes of those choices can help children to develop a deeper understanding of the narrative and to connect more personally with the story. Engaging in these discussions helps to make reading a more interactive and reflective activity, rather than a passive one.

Exploring the Central Ideas of a Text

Every book has central ideas or themes that the author is trying to convey. Helping your child to identify and explore these themes can significantly deepen their engagement with the text. Discussing themes like friendship, courage, or justice allows your child to connect the story to broader concepts and to reflect on how these ideas relate to their own life. Ask questions like, “What do you think the author is trying to say about friendship in this book?” or “How does the character’s journey illustrate the theme of courage?” These discussions help children to move beyond the surface level of the story and to think more deeply about its underlying messages. Understanding the central ideas of a text encourages children to reflect on their own values and experiences, making reading a more meaningful and thought-provoking activity.

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Using Tools to Help Them Understand the Plot

Visual aids like character maps, timelines, or plot diagrams can be incredibly helpful in aiding your child’s understanding of a book’s plot. These tools allow children to visualize the relationships between characters, track the progression of the story, and see how different events are interconnected. Using Romeo and Juliet character maps, for instance, can help your child to keep track of who’s who in the story and to understand the dynamics between different characters. Plot diagrams can help them to see the structure of the story, from the introduction and rising action to the climax and resolution. These tools are particularly useful for more complex books with multiple characters and subplots. By using these visual aids, children can better grasp the intricacies of the story, which in turn deepens their engagement and enjoyment of the book.

Looking at Adaptations of the Text

Exploring different adaptations of a book, such as films, TV shows, or comics, can provide a new perspective and deepen your child’s engagement with the story. Watching a film adaptation of a book they’ve read allows them to see how the story is interpreted by others and to compare it to their own understanding of the text. This comparison can lead to rich discussions about the differences between the book and its adaptation, such as changes in plot, character portrayal, or setting. It also encourages critical thinking, as your child considers why certain changes were made and how they affect the overall story. Comics or graphic novel adaptations can be particularly appealing for younger readers, providing a visual representation of the story that can enhance comprehension and enjoyment. By exploring these adaptations, children can engage with the story in a new way, deepening their understanding and appreciation of the original text.

Making Use of Cliff Notes

Cliff Notes or similar study guides can be valuable tools for helping your child to engage more deeply with the books they read. These guides often provide summaries, analyses, and discussion questions that can enhance understanding and stimulate critical thinking. Using Cliff Notes can help your child to clarify complex plot points, understand difficult vocabulary, and explore themes and literary techniques in greater depth. They can also serve as a starting point for discussions, helping you to ask more informed questions and to guide your child’s analysis of the text. However, it’s important to use these guides as a supplement to the book, rather than a replacement, to ensure that your child still engages with the original text. When used appropriately, Cliff Notes can enhance your child’s reading experience and help them to develop a deeper understanding of the book.

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Talking About Themes in Terms of Modern Living

One of the most effective ways to help your child engage deeply with a book is by relating its themes to modern life. Discussing how the themes of a book apply to current events, societal issues, or your child’s own experiences makes the reading material more relevant and meaningful. For example, if a book deals with themes of justice, you might discuss how these themes relate to contemporary issues in society. By making these connections, you help your child to see the relevance of the book’s messages and to think critically about how literature can inform their understanding of the world around them. This approach not only deepens their engagement with the text but also encourages them to reflect on the role of literature in shaping ideas and values. By relating the themes of a book to modern living, you help your child to see reading as a powerful tool for understanding and navigating the world.

With the tips above, you can give your child all of the tools that they need to engage more thoroughly with the books they read, which is vitally important during their education.

Craft activities are such a great way to keep the kids entertained, and can help them develop a wide range of skills too. For example, reading instructions can be great for working on literacy skills, particularly with reluctant readers. Counting out supplies and timing how long things take to dry is also good for numeracy skills. Crafts are also a great way to spend quality time bonding with children, where there’s no pressure or expectations on either of you.

Here are some tips and ideas to help you use crafts to keep the kids entertained and learning over the summer holiday.

Start a recycling box for crafts

Add toilet roll tubes, bottle lids, tin foil, and tubs that are all great materials for crafting with. Encourage children to be a part of the activity from the start if possible, for example, ask what they would like to make, or what theme of activity they would like and involve them in gathering the supplies. Or why not ask them what they think they could make from a certain item of recycling?

Get the basics together- scissors, glue and some pens are a great start. Glue dots are good because they don’t require any time to dry and don’t make any mess. Prepare your space, you could use a wipe down tablecloth or even newspaper to cover the table.

Summer crafts: create a scrapbook

At the beginning of the holidays, you could start a scrapbook. Then encourage your children to save mementos throughout the holiday- cinema tickets, receipts from going out, a leaf from a walk, etc. They can doodle on the pages, jot down memories from the day and add photos. They then have a lovely record of their time off and it’s a great way to spend time as a family.

Make a moneybox

Take a butter/spread tub and cut a slit in the top big enough for coins, decorate with stickers, label with their name etc. If it’s a bit sharp cover the edges in tape. This could encourage children to save any pocket money they might get!

Make a door sign

Cut open a cereal box and write your child’s name in bubble type writing on the biggest side. Cut up sparkly paper/card/tissue paper/stickers- anything they can find and fill in the letters. This can then be a door sign, popped in a frame or on the fridge! They could also do others names as gifts.

Handprint crafts

Draw around children’s hands and turn them into fun characters with faces on their palms. They could decorate the fingers as hair, turn them upside down so the fingers are arms and legs or even turn them on the side and make fish! Use googly eyes for a bit of fun!

Make cards

Write a list of birthdays or occasions you have coming up over the rest of the year. Buy card blanks or simply fold some card in half and children can choose who to make a card for each time they want something to do! They could use stencils, draw, stick on stickers, gems, the list is endless and you aren’t then panic buying a shop bought card.

I hope this shows you that crafts don’t need to be over complicated or expensive. Whether you are looking for activities for children to do on their own or to do with them, the beauty of crafts is that they are really adaptable! You can prep loads of elements or leave it for the kids. Whatever they make the children will enjoy doing it.

Summer craft club

If you’d like to find out about my summer craft club, follow Creative Little Crafters on Facebook and head over to the website to find out about my personalised children’s craft box subscriptions.

If you enjoyed reading this article, why not buy me a coffee to show your support for the magazine? If you’d like to read more articles about adoption, head over to the home page and have a look at what’s new.

A lot of parents either want to go back to work once their adoption/maternity leave ends, or financially, they have no choice. Finding the right setting for your child can be stressful so this article will give you an idea of what the options are.

Every child is different and what works best for one, might not work for another with the same needs. There are a wide range of styles of setting from a curiosity approach nursery to playgroups and childminders, so research is the key. Get as much information as you can about what’s available in your area and then go and have a look around to see what’s going to be best for your child. Ask lots of questions and if your child has particular needs, make sure the setting is aware and has the resources to manage them.

I think childminder or nursery settings are the kind of thing where your first impression is the right one. When we were looking for a place for our eldest daughter, we only visited one nursery. It felt safe and welcoming straight away and we knew it was the right one for our daughter.

Our experience

Our eldest is shy and has separation anxiety which was quite bad when she first started nursery. She used to get very upset at drop-off but settled quickly after I left. As hard as it was at the time, for her, nursery was the best option. Mixing with other children of her age really brought her out of her shell and helped her to be more confident. She thrived in the setting and made a lot of friends.

The staff were brilliant with her and extremely supportive, particularly at drop-offs. They knew about her background and were sensitive to it when they did work about families with the children. She didn’t need any additional support, but we knew it was available to her if she did.

Nurseries are a great place to introduce children to their peers and help to build up their social skills. The days are structured with a range of learning activities and play. They usually open early in the morning until early evening making them a popular choice for working parents.

Early Years Pupil Premium

From the age of three, adopted children are entitled to access to Early Years Pupil Premium which entitles their childcare provider to extra financial support to help them achieve their full potential. How it’s spent is up to the provider and may be used for something like providing additional training or services such as a speech and language therapist. If your child has a particular need, speak to the manager about whether the funding can be used to support this.

Childminder

A childminder looks after up to six children in their home. Because there’s a smaller number of children, each child will get more individual attention. It is therefore better for children who don’t cope well in loud, busy settings and feels more like a home from home for a child.

We used a childminder for wrap-around care when our eldest daughter started school and it really suited her. She was shattered after a day at school and there is more opportunity to relax at the childminder’s. But I don’t think it would’ve prepared her for school as well as nursery did. She still struggled with separation anxiety when she started school, but we’d all learned how to manage it better because of the skills she’d gained at nursery.

A childminder or nursery – which is best for your child?

So, the answer as to whether a childminder or nursery is better for your family will very much depend on the needs of your child. If they need more individual, one-to-one time, a childminder is probably best. For those who crave being with lots of kids of their own age, nursery may be best. Or, they may need a combination of both.

If you enjoyed reading this article, why not buy me a coffee to show your support for the magazine? If you’d like to read more articles about adoption, health and well-being, and parenting, head over to the home page and have a look at what’s new.

There’s two main types of situation where language is important in adoption. Firstly, the language we use in our homes affects how our children feel about adoption. And secondly, the language others use to talk about adoption either to children or parents.

Language used at home

When we started our adoption journey, there wasn’t much literature around about language and it wasn’t something we covered during the assessment. So to a certain extent, we’ve had to learn on the go.
And it’s important to note here that the language we use is particular to our children’s needs and circumstances. Words and phrases that we use, may not be appropriate for other families. But that doesn’t make them wrong for us. And the language we use changes as the children get older.

For example, I know that the terms “tummy mummy” and “forever family” creates a mixed reaction amongst the adoption community. We used both terms to explain adoption to our eldest daughter when she was younger.

Tummy mummy came about because her nursery nurse was pregnant. That sparked conversations when she was three around the fact that her teacher had a baby in her tummy. Naturally that led to her asking about growing in my tummy. I told her that she didn’t, but she grew in my heart and her tummy mummy’s tummy.

At the time, that helped her understand that she had two mummies. And that she grew inside one’s tummy and in the other’s feelings. We knew that the term wasn’t something that we’d always use to refer to birth mum.

There wasn’t a particular moment when we sat her down and said we thought she needed to come up with another name. It’s just something that evolved in our discussions around birth family and her life story. She now calls her birth mum (and dad) just that.

Let your child take the lead

If a child is, for example, six, and has lived with her birth mum, referring to her as their tummy mummy wouldn’t be appropriate. The terminology used to refer to birth family is something that is very personal to your child and their circumstances. So, it’s important to be led by them.

Similarly, when she was younger, we used forever family to explain that she would always be part of our family. She was too young to understand that everyone was her family, but she lived with us and we are legally her parents. Using forever family helped her understand the basics at a young age.

It’s not something we used very often, mainly just when we were looking at her life story book. It’s not something we’ve used for a long time because it doesn’t represent anything to her. She is hopefully growing up knowing that we are all her family. And that we have distinct roles in her care.

We haven’t used either term when talking to our youngest daughter about her life story. She is very different from her big sister and didn’t show much curiosity and is only now at almost five asking questions.

I know from listening to adult adoptees that both of those terms inappropriately can cause a lot of hurt. That’s why any language needs to be used carefully and considerately. As our girls get older, they take the lead in what they want to call their birth family.

Language used by others

“Real parents”, “normal kids”, or “your proper children” are examples of language used by people who have no concept of the issues involved in adoption. I hope those kinds of things are said without intending to cause upset. But the fact is, they can and do cause hurt and upset to an adoptee.

If you’re talking to someone about, say, adoption, or a disability, and you don’t know the correct language to use, ask. It’s impossible for us to know the right thing to say in every situation. So, if in doubt, check.

And take your lead from the person you’re talking to. If you know someone is adopted, don’t ask them about their birth history unless they offer information about it. You wouldn’t ask a birth child what their birth was like. Or whether their mum drank alcohol when she was pregnant. So don’t ask an adoptee or adopter those kinds of questions.

We all have unique stories about how we came into the world. And they’re ours to tell to those we want to.

As a rule of thumb, an adopted child’s first family are referred to as that or their birth family. Or just their family. If it comes up naturally in a conversation, ask them how they’d like you to refer to their family.

Adoption UK have a lot of resources to help with things like using the right words. Leave a comment if you’ve come across any tools or resources that you’ve found helpful so that we can all check it out.

Head over to the adoption section to read more articles and interviews about the process from those with first-hand experience.