This article written by Lauren Peacock from Little Sleep Stars is full of tips and advice about how to do just that. It was written at the start of 2020 when Covid was just starting to take over our lives.

Working with families to gently improve sleep in babies and children, Little Sleep Stars was founded by former lawyer, Lauren, following her own journey with a sleepless child. Lauren’s obsession with how and why children sleep the way do became a passion and then a fully-fledged career-change.

Underpinned by the most rigorous and in-depth training available in the field of paediatric sleep, Lauren approaches sleep on a whole-child basis. It’s only with a thorough understanding of issues such as sensory-processing, anxiety and infant-feeding that a truly gentle, holistic and respectful sleep solution can be arrived at.

Lauren’s blog Little Sleep Star Stories is full of tips on how to support and improve your child’s sleep. You can find her on Instagram.

How to improve your child’s sleep

We’re living in unprecedented times. Many families now have their children at home full-time. For those still attending school, life is definitely different to normal. Even at this early stage of what could be a very long road, I’m hearing from a huge number of families who’re finding that sleep is one of the many things to have gone off-track since social-distancing measures took hold.

Challenges appear particularly prevalent in those children who are currently in Early Years and Key Stage One, who will be the focus of this article.

The challenge of sleep

National emergencies aside, children in the four to seven age bracket often go through bumpy periods with sleep. Frustrating as this can be for parents, periodic sleep-disturbance as children grow, develop and change, is entirely normal. Common culprits for interfering with sleep around this age are:

Anxiety

No-one likes to think of their child being anxious. Yet all children go through entirely normal bouts of separation anxiety without it being cause for alarm. When children experience a more generalised anxiety, sleep disturbance is often the first and/or, most obvious indication.

Big transitions, such as starting school or the shift from Reception into Year One, often unsettle children. Some will feel this particularly acutely. Similarly, the demands of school, social participation and separation from a primary caregiver are manageable for some children but have a more profound impact on others.

A child who has previously fallen asleep independently but begins to seek an increased level of parental involvement in settling to sleep, may genuinely need that support. Handled sensitively, these phases tend to pass fairly quickly. When sleep disturbance including difficulty settling to sleep, nightmares, frequent night-waking and/or daytime tiredness appear in young children, it is always worth considering anxiety as the driver. This is especially so if other signs such as teeth-grinding, digestive distress, frequent urination, sensitivity to noise, muscle tension or sweating are also present.

The current climate is undoubtedly worrying and I would advise parents to be careful around the messages children are receiving about COVID-19. When a child hears, “it’s just a bad cold”; “coronavirus is killing thousands”; “it’s only old people who are dying”; “we’re all going to get it at some point”, those messages can assimilate to a lot of worry for a developing brain. Children may lie awake worrying that they, or their family members, will catch this “cold” and die.

Families should be particularly careful around exposure to television as studies show that indirect exposure to harrowing events can trigger anxiety and even PTSD in children who are vulnerable. Especially where the traumatic event involves a child of a similar age.

Given the increasingly severity of the COVID-19 position and our 24/7 news culture, social isolation offers an opportunity to exercise a level of control over messaging. I always suggest age-appropriate truth supported by emotion coaching and strong modelling of emotional regulation. In that regard, we can see these hard times as an opportunity to help our children to build their own resilience. 

Over-tiredness

We don’t typically think of four-and-five-year olds needing to nap. But some really aren’t ready to go through the full day without sleep. This is commonly the case for children with challenges around sensory-integration, who often have a higher sleep than is average for their age.

When a child aged three or older is either unable or unwilling to nap, I often advise parents to have designated “quiet time” immediately after lunch. Around one hour of calm, quiet play away from screens, which might include reading, jigsaws, puzzles or lying down listening to audio books.

Whilst the traditional school day offers little to no opportunity for this structure, with the middle of day usually spent tearing around the playground, home-education enables the day to be structured in a sleep-supportive way. For children used to an educational or childcare environment, working to a schedule of sorts may also be helpful to keep them feeling settled and secure.

Whilst I am not advocating attempting to replicate the school day or sticking rigidly to some of the very specific timetables, for younger children, having a broad plan and flow to the day can make things feel less overwhelming.

Whilst our adult perspective may see having the whole day to play with whatever and whenever takes their fancy as a treat, for little ones this can be daunting. This leads to poor concentration and difficulty around transitions. Many children find a visual timetable reassuring, as well as being fun to make!

Nutrition

What children eat, and when they eat it, can have a surprising impact on their sleep. Foods which are known to support sleep include: almonds, bananas, cherries, kiwi, milk, papaya, spinach, sweet potato, turkey and whole-wheat pasta. So if you can get your hands on them, incorporating some of the foods into your child’s diet give them the best chance of sleeping well. By contrast, avoiding caffeinated drinks, chocolate, tomatoes, aubergine, aged cheeses, dried fruits and fatty or spicy foods, especially late in the day, can also help. They all contain substances that are either stimulating or hard to digest.

Occasionally, sleep challenges in children are driven by low-levels of some vitamins and minerals. Vitamins B12, C and D, iron, calcium, zinc, potassium and magnesium are particularly important. With many families currently trying to juggle work commitments whilst having children at home, batch and/or slow-cooking can be effective ways to keep mealtimes sleep-supportive. In addition, and especially if children are spending an increased amount of time indoors, a family may wish to consider a good-quality and age-appropriate supplement, particularly for Vitamin D.

Whilst these challenging times have many characteristics likely to unsettle sleep, they do also present opportunities to improve it. And in times like this, we have to take the positives!

Click here to read more article about improving your child’s sleep.

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The importance of a good night’s sleep for your little one and how to get it

Quality sleep is essential to our wellbeing and that of our children, but it’s not always easy to come by. Just like walking, talking and other milestones, the ability to fall asleep independently (and to stay asleep!) is something that is learned at developmentally appropriate times. The tricky part is how to help your child do this.

Why should we bother? Lack of quality sleep is increasingly linked to behavioural issues, impaired learning and immune system, not to mention emotional wellbeing. Adequate rest is very important during times of change or adjustment, as it helps all of us to regulate our emotions.

The goal is not ‘sleeping through the night’. None of us actually do this. We all wake up to some degree throughout the night, as we cycle between light and deep sleep. We’re unlikely to be awake long enough to remember this. But for children, they may stay awake if they haven’t learned the skill of falling back to sleep independently.

There are a whole host of common sleep issues that parents experience. The most common of these tend to be frequent night waking, early rising, short naps and fighting sleep. Approaching sleep from a holistic point of view is most helpful to tackle these issues. Taking into account your little one’s history, personality, health conditions and how they respond to you, will help you form a considered plan to improve your situation.

Supporting sleep

Research tells us that by around six months or age, many babies are physiologically capable of going through the night without a feed, but many are not. There are lots of things we can do to support the sleep of our littles ones:

Darkness

Black out those bedrooms! We sleep much better in a dark environment because our bodies are able to better produce melatonin (our sleep hormone). If your little one needs a night light then I advise an amber or red light. These colours don’t affect our sleep in the same way that white & blue light does which tell our bodies to wake up.

Temperature

Have the temperature on the cooler side. We don’t want your baby to get too cold but equally we are designed to sleep in slightly cooler temperatures. The ideal room temperature for sleeping is 16-20 Celsius.

Consistency

When your baby or toddler stirs during the night, they expect their sleep conditions to be the same as when they fell asleep. It might be worth assessing how your little one gets to sleep at bedtime and working on practising falling asleep independently, with the aim that one day they will be able to do this on their own. Consistency is key!

Daytime routine

Work on your daytime routine. Babies (and adults), really benefit from doing things at a similar time each day. A predictable routine can help baby anticipate what is coming next and to ensure that they get adequate daytime sleep. They soon learn what is coming next, which in turns makes them feel more relaxed.

Comforter

Introduce a comforter to your baby or infant. This is a small (often soft) object that provides baby with a sense of safety and security. They are a portable best friend who signals to your little one that it’s time to relax and unwind for bedtime. A comforter can support a baby who is stressed or faced with a change in their normal environment.

Sleep pointers for newly adopted babies and children

Gathering information on previous sleep environment and bedtime routines can be helpful. Some babies and children may not be used to sleeping alone and will need some time to adjust. Your little one may become overstimulated in their new environment, not used to the new love and stimulation from you.

While they’re forming new attachments, they can feel a little insecure around bedtime. This is entirely normal. It’s important to be available, but also give them space when they need it. It’s all part of the process of getting to know one another. If you’re looking to improve your newly arrived little one’s sleep, I recommend a gentle method where you show constant verbal or physical reassurance and slowly move out over time, to support your growing attachment.

Remember, no baby or parent is the same, and no situation is the same. What works for YOU and YOUR child is most important. It is never too early or too late to work on your little one’s sleep skills.

To read more articles about sleep, click to read here.

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Most children will settle into a new sleep routine. But for some adopted children, sleep issues have a huge impact on them and the rest of their family. Kerry from The Sleep Fixer is a sleep specialist and explains why sleep is a common issue for adopted children. In this article she gives advice about how to improve things and information about the services she provides to help families overcome sleep problems. You can follow Kerry on Facebook and Instagram.

The most blissful word ‘sleep’

I just want to take a moment to introduce myself and give you a little bit of background. My name is Kerry and I’m a sleep specialist. I’ve been working in the field of sleep for the last nine years, eight of which were spent within local authority and the NHS. I’ve had the pleasure of working with many children and their families both pre and post adoption on sleep issues. They’ve had some absolutely outstanding results, achieving some really good, positive sleep outcomes allowing families to function the best they can.

It’s no secret that poor sleep has a detrimental impact on health and well-being. It’s one of the leading causes of mental health issues. Poor sleep impacts on the whole family. Alongside other issues that can arise post adoption, it can contribute to a breakdown in placements. We all need our sleep!

So, what are the most common causes for sleep issues in children post adoption?

A large proportion of children post adoption will have difficulties with sleep. These can range from difficulties in falling asleep, waking up during the night to waking very early in the morning.

There may be several causes for these issues and they can vary in intensity from child to child.

Sleep – the biological process

Our bodies are equipped with an internal clock, known as the circadian rhythm. This helps to set our sleep/wake cues. The clock is strengthened by external cues that we give it or support our children to give it. This helps our bodies to process the information and allow our clocks to work effectively thus falling asleep at a set time and waking at a set time.

Having consistent bedtimes and wake times will inform the circadian clock of what it should be doing and when.

Some children may have not experienced this consistent cycle that leads to an established sleep/wake cycle. This can lead to erratic sleep cycles or a sleep cycle that is set to work at the ‘wrong’ time of the night and/or morning.

It’s important to have certain information to work out if this is a factor in a child’s sleep. If, for example, a child of seven years old is going to bed at an age appropriate time of say 8pm, but their body clock is not telling them to fall asleep until, say, 10pm, they will effectively be awake in bed for three hours. This in turn can lead to behavioural issues and an increase in stress and worry!

Sleep – the learned process

In order for our bodies to achieve a good quality and quantity of sleep, we have to teach it what to do consistently. Children will often require parental input for these to be effective in the early stages. This is where children will develop the skills to self-settle. But some children, post adoption, may not have these developed skills and need a little support.

Our environment will also play a crucial role in falling to sleep. What does our environment look like? Is it consistently the same throughout the night? Post adoption there will always be a change in environment. To some degree, this will have an effect on sleep for most.

For example, a child may have shared a room with other siblings and/or parents. They may be used to a noisy environment at bedtime or may not have even slept in a bed. Considering the type of environment a child may have been used to settling to sleep in, will also be a consideration.

Emotions during trauma

Difficult situations arising at bedtime in the past can understandably contribute to a child’s difficulties around bedtime. Also, attachment will play a huge role in the ability to fall asleep.

During dream sleep, we process and consolidate memories. This can be difficult when healing and processing lots of information and change. Nightmares, night terrors and sleep walking can occur as a result of this which can often be difficult to manage. It can also create fear around bedtime itself for both the parents and child.

It can be the case that the lead up to bedtime and bedtime itself triggers difficult emotions in children post adoption. Stress, worry and anxiety are closely related to sleep difficulties.

These are just a few examples of the situations that I’ve seen in practice. It’s often the case that children may have a mixture of these that need a little extra input. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Sleep really can have such a positive impact and there are definite ways to improve sleep outcomes for children post adoption. For adoptive parents, I think having a really good underpinning knowledge around sleep can be so helpful. This coupled up with some support and a listening ear.

The Sleep Fixer

The Sleep Fixer was launched to support and help parents through this challenging time. I work alongside families with children and young people aged between 1-18 years.

The Sleep Fixer takes into account the biological, learned and emotional aspects of sleep. There are two options for support offered via 1-2-1 telephone/video consultation or the digital pack. Both of these options are underpinned with a great deal of knowledge and experience. This empowers parents to make simple changes that really can make all the difference. Sleep needs to be looked at as a whole and in a positive manner. It’s something we should prioritise and cherish.

Every family that accesses either option will receive full support every step of the way whilst they implement changes. There are no timeframes, and this is not about ‘a’ training method. It really is about you and your family getting the sleep you so rightfully deserve to help strengthen physical, emotional and mental health. We take it at yours and your child’s pace to ensure that everyone is happy.

Click to read more articles about sleep from Lauren and Rosey.

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