The Parent Guide to Surviving Exams

Written by Beckie Whitehouse, life coach and hypnotherapist, helping mums of teens and empty nesters rediscover themselves, embrace change, and Thrive

As parents, we want to support our youngsters, but it’s not always easy to know what helps and what doesn’t during exam time.

This article covers my top tips for supporting your teenager through the exam period.

Exams are a part of growing up, and although we may not agree with how they’re conducted or what they actually tell us, GCSEs and A Levels can open doors to the next step. All exams help with preparation for the next academic year to some degree, but let’s also remember they do not completely define your child or their future.

Tips for supporting your child through exams

Every child is different, so avoid comparisons with siblings, friends or anyone else.

Remember too that qualities like kindness, honesty, generosity and resilience are not measured in exam grades, and yet they define character and matter in life and relationships.

Try not to project your own worries, fears or ambitions onto your child. Think about your own expectations.

Our young people want to feel loved. Keep reminding them in words and in actions that they are loved and accepted, whatever the results may be.

Each student will receive an exam timetable. Encourage your child to check it carefully for any clashes or errors. If there are any, they need to be reported to school or college as soon as possible. It can help to print the timetable and display it somewhere visible, so nothing is missed.

If your youngster would like support, you can help them create a realistic revision timetable. The keyword here is realistic. They cannot revise all day, every day. You might offer to test them or offer them a different space to study.

And if you want to introduce rewards, focus them on effort and commitment rather than results.

Good health to support learning

Teenagers typically need between eight and 10 hours of sleep. Encouraging sleep is far more helpful than last-minute cramming the night before an exam.

Allow about half an hour of wind-down time between studying and going to bed.

Balanced meals and regular snacks help concentration and energy. As many of us will have experienced, snacks can be of particular importance.

Usual activities like sports groups and hobbies are a release from the pressure. They allow time in the fresh air, movement, creativity and connection with others, so encourage usual participation.

Make time for nice things, too. Seeing friends or attending family celebrations it reminds our teens that life continues beyond exams.

Keep communication open – ask open questions. Your teen may just want to let off steam and feel heard. You don’t need to fix everything for them. You can remind them that nerves and some anxiety are normal. The aim isn’t zero nerves, it’s manageable nerves.

You can share your own experiences of exams, the good and the not-so-good. Remember what it felt like at their age. Put yourself in their shoes.

Often, they already know what they need to do. They hear the revision messages regularly at school. Gentle support tends to work better than repeated reminders.

The parent guide to surving exams: Signs of stress

Look out for signs of stress. These can show up in many ways:

Headaches or stomach aches
Poor sleep
Irritability
Low mood
Eating more or less than usual
Increased negativity or hopelessness

Encourage them to talk to a friend, teacher, grandparent or trusted adult.

If you feel your child is struggling, it may be helpful to speak to their form tutor, teacher or member of staff at school/college. Support is usually available.

Dealing with results

Results may be better than expected, or they may be disappointing.

It might mean adjusting plans: a different course, college, sixth form, or exploring different options such as clearing. Schools and colleges often have staff available for advice/guidance, and often students already know the next steps.

Be around, be calm, be available if they need you.

Finally, remember to look after yourself too. This can be a stressful time for parents as well, and our young people notice how we respond, so lead by example.

And remember, exams do not last forever.

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FAQs About supporting your child through exams

How can I help my child cope with exam stress?

You can help your child cope with exam stress by keeping communication open and offering calm, supportive encouragement. Ask open questions, listen without judgement, and remind them that feeling nervous before exams is normal. Encourage healthy habits such as regular sleep, balanced meals, exercise, and time with friends. If stress seems overwhelming, it can also help to speak with a teacher, tutor, or another trusted adult for additional support.

How much sleep does a teenager need during exams?

Teenagers generally need 8–10 hours of sleep each night. Getting enough sleep helps with concentration, memory and emotional wellbeing, making it more beneficial than staying up late to cram revision the night before an exam.

What are the signs of exam stress in teenagers?

Exam stress can show up in different ways, including headaches, stomach aches, poor sleep, irritability, low mood, or changes in eating habits. If you notice these signs, encourage your child to talk to someone they trust, such as a parent, teacher, friend, or another supportive adult.

What should parents say to their child about exam results?

Remind your child that exam results do not define who they are or their future. Whether results are better or worse than expected, there are always options available, such as alternative courses, different colleges, or other educational pathways.